Let's start with the big question: how old is too old to wear Superdry® clothing?
I'm afraid is it almost impossible to answer this scientifically. The received wisdom is that once you reach 25, 30, 40, ... you are too old to walk around covered with logos of any kind, let alone the Superdry® ones. But we've seen middle-aged dads, grandads even, doing so. Yet these outlaws are not arrested, deported, or even given a stern verbal warning from security staff. Let's for argument's sake assume that there is no age limit (it'll make things easier).
What about Superdry® jackets? Well, perhaps a more pertinent question is how many zips is enough zips? They, as a rule, have too many zips. Last time I zipped up a jacket I found one zip was all I needed to get the job done. Yet Superdry®, inspired perhaps by the unnecessarily multi-mouthed alien in the 'Alien' films, give their outerwear upwards of thirty zips. Stop it. If you particularly crave zips, for whatever "reasons" you may have, go ahead. Some of their jackets don't have loads of zips, and in my humble opinion these would be the ones to go for.
Now let's get on to t-shirts. They're the cheapest entry into the world of The 'Dry® (as no one calls them), and as a result the most popular. Which ones should you choose? We will concentrate on the words printed on said t-shirts, because it's all about the words...
The Superdry® Logo
Which one? There appears to be loads of different ones, which is a problem for corporate identity. Their stationary must be all over the shop (no pun intended, none taken). You could argue that the smaller the logo, the smaller the issue, but Superdry® are all about the big letters on t-shirts. So instead of buying a Superdry® t-shirt with a tiny logo, you could be buying a cheaper t-shirt with no logo on it at all.
"Real"
As opposed to those virtual t-shirts you mean? I'm guessing this is to differentiate themselves from pirate versions of Superdry® garments. Of course if anyone was going to counterfeit Superdry®, the last thing they'd think of putting on them would be "Real" (*eye-roll emoji*). The word "Real" is pointless here, let's see what else they've got...
"Genuine"
See "Real" above. Otherwise touch one; if it exists, it must on some level be genuine. "I feel, therefore it is", as the man said.
"Yokohama High Flyers"
No idea really. Do you automatically become a member of this (no doubt august) body of men/women merely by buying a t-shirt? I've never had flying lessons; is it easy? Does buying one of these t-shirts get you a discount on high-flying lessons in Yokohama? Do you have to show your Yokohama High Flyers membership card before buying one of these? So many questions. Perhaps too many questions...
"Classics"
We'll be the judges of that, sunshine. If the design they refer to is a classic, why would it have "Classic" written on it? They never called Classic Coca Cola "Classic" from the start did they (*points at brain*)? Did they decide at the outset that these designs would already be classics? If so that's brave, fucking brave.
"Vintage"
First you must ask the same questions as "Classic" raised. Then, and only then, you have to spend at least eight hours getting your head round what "Vintage" might mean. Are they second-hand? You know, like, are they from a particularly good year for Superdry® and some kind soul decided to donate them to the store curator unworn? Were you supposed to buy them in the 60's and shrine them away until they matured enough to be wearable? Problematic.
The-Ones-That-Look-Like-The-Football-Strip-Of-An-Actual-Superdry®-Football-Team
Yeah, right.
"Team"
See The-Ones-That-Look-Like-The-Football-Strip-Of-An-Actual-Superdry®-Football-Team. These may be referring to members of staff of course, in which case all the questions (so many questions) aimed at "Yokohama High Flyers" apply here too.
It's a place in Japan. If you've been there and forgot to get a t-shirt to commemorate the experience, you might do worse than get one of these. Depending on font and colour preferences, this could be one of the more "fair enough" choices, because it doubles as a tourist souvenir as well as a fashion statement.
To conclude, once you've taken on board the above questions, it really depends on whether you like the look of Superdry® garments or not. I think they suit girls more than blokes, but hey, wear what you like. If anyone has suggested you're too old to wear a Superdry® t-shirt, perhaps now is the time to give them *the fingers* and take the plunge. If they do them in your size, then according to the laws of this still green and pleasant land, you're allowed to wear them.
